This pertains to us at this moment for one reason: the title and address of this blog are no longer relevant being that they entail me being somewhere I am not. 

Please bookmark my new blog and new life at the South American equator at www.ecuadorianextravaganza.wordpress.com … Which I find to be a much more suiting title.

Within this blog I will soon post exactly how I escaped from Bolivia to Peru to the United States and eventually found myself here in Quito, Ecuador… And so the story begins. 

God bless.

Wesley

As much as I miss the monthly cell phone plans of our homeland, I just learned about some news that I thought was really exciting.  You can text me for FREE from the United States.  That’s right folks… Absolutely 100% free with no charge to you OR me.  How great, no?

Here’s how you do it…

FIRST go to this site… it’s in Spanish but I’ll walk you through it.  It’s simple even if you don’t speak Spanish (push control and click simultaneously on this link and you’ll go right there):

http://www.tigo.com.bo/v2/envio_mensajes.php

SECOND type my cell phone number under “Para”.

My number is 77694745

THIS MEANS that you drop down the “76″ option under “Para” and change it to “77″… that’s the first two digits of my phone number.  Then type the remaining numbers into the blank space.

THIRD write me a message under “texto”.  This section can be in English if you’d prefer. 

FOURTH copy the pictured letters into the blank under “Codigo”

FIFTH sign your name under “Firma” so I know who you are.

SIXTH send away!  Just press “Enviar” and you’re in bussiness.  One completely free text message sent to the Southern Hemisphere.  Awesome, huh?  I think so.

Anyway, post any questions you have about this and I’ll be sure to answer back.  If I didn’t specify a certain section leave it blank!

Even if you are completely unfamiliar with “texting” or have nothing of great importance to say to me, send me a text message anyway!  It’d be great to hear from you AND you get to send a free text message to South America.  Whoo!

Testing water quality with my friend Matt and the jefe (boss)

Donkey Kisses

Bolivian countryside form of transportation

Latin dance club accomplice

Myself inhabiting one of the sketchier hotels Bolivia has to offer

Roommate, Buddy, and Pet

Banana pancake-making station

View of the Chaco from my patio

Patio

Bathroom complete with pink toilet paper

Little slice of the bedroom

The Andes Mountains from my bedroom window

Mi Casa

My host Bolivian host parents... the next best thing

Recent break through: discovery of a supermarket in a large city four hours from my site.

Recommended Serving Size: 3 per container… 

Bolivian serving size: 1 box…

I am aware that this adds up to be over 1200 calories by the time I’m done with this cuisine.  However, I figure 24 hours a day of conjugating Spanish verbs (including dreaming in Spanish… I really can’t escape from Bolivians now) will make up for it.  I’ve even pushed myself to share the hoard with my American site mate from time to time which has been a positive growing experience for me. 

I’ve been warned by my superiors that women have gotten a hold of the date rape drug here in Bolivia.  It is especially common in larger cities for women known as “pildoritas” to slip the drug into unsuspecting male victims’ drinks.  The offender then lures the helpless man to a secure location where he passes out and… Nope… she takes his money.

I’ll withhold from providing any further insight on gender and human desire…

Um… ok…

Since Wal*Mart has not yet made its way to Bolivia, all business is small business.  There is a small family owned store for most anything.  However I woke up one morning this week and walked out my door to find that one stocky, go-getting Bolivian woman had decided to make the bold business move of setting up a female undergarment tienda right in front of my house.  Currently a generous 1/3 of my doorway is now obstructed by a table containing lacy Latin women’s what-have-you’s.  Given the inevitable awkwardness of talking to a woman behind a table of underwear I’ve decided to bury the hatchet.

For those of you who read my prior posting, this is not helping convince community members that my house is indeed not a brothel.

When socially offered a cup of tea in Bolivia, saying “Thank you” means “I don’t want any”.  You can’t be too polite here.

I have a pet gecko that somehow did a ninja move and snuck into my bedroom one night when the door was open.  He’s the size of my thumb, likes sitting in my hand, and eats bugs for me.  I’m still looking for a few little specks of gecko poop to clean up just to make it official… the pet thing that is.  I’m open for name suggestions.

Thanks again for your feed back.  It’s always good to hear from Americans.  God bless and enjoy the summer for me during my Bolivian winter in the southern hem.

Then the questions came… from elderly women, shop keepers… even my own landlord.  “What do those red lanterns on your patio mean?”  I would explain every time, but I started to get suspicious of the questioning so I decided to ask my landlord about it.  He informed me by saying, “In Bolivia, red lights mean one of two things… Night clubs or brothels.”  Decorating Bolivia attempt number one: failed.  More to come.

I have not seen carpet for half a year now.  It does not exist in Bolivia.

I figure I have two years to perfect a life long skill on my freetime here.  I’ve decided it is going to be cooking.  So far I’ve mastered the omlette, pan cakes, spaghetti (sauce made from scratch), chicken, and macaroni and cheese (made from a box).

There nearest can of peanut butter here is a four hour drive away.

I don’t own a Bolivian driver’s license.

RULES OF FORMERLY GREETING A BOLIVIAN:

Women will shake hands with women but simultaneously kiss the cheek of the other woman. 

Men do the same with women and women with men.  However, if a younger man is greeting an older woman, he must wait for the woman to lean forward before kissing her. 

It is possible to kiss both cheeks in a greeting.  However neither party ever knows when the other is going to do so… This often leads to awkward, head bobbing moments.  The trick is learning to make those moments look natural.

Men do not kiss men on the cheek. 

If you go to the country side, people to do not kiss. 

If you’re in a city, they do. 

If a man greets another man, they must first shake hands, then place the left hand above the hip of the other, pat his left shoulder with the right hand, and after doing so shake hands once more with the other man.  If the man is better known, a palm grip is also added to the final handshake.

Other things…

Just a few notes of adding people to the Blog… I don’t know who’s getting the emails or not, but anyone can go to this site.  Checking back on a weekly basis is the best way to find new posts.  Sorry about that.

I also have some interesting pictures from Bolivia I’d like for you to look at.  I’m currently searching for a good website to post those and some videos, too.  If you’ve got ideas, comment to me on this post.  Thanks.

And speaking of comments, it’s been great to read comments from folks in the US.  Keep it up.  It’s great to hear from you even if you don’t have much to say.  Keeps my English sharp.  Have a great day and God bless.

Wesley

Highlights of the last 4 months: Learning (enough) Spanish, Saltanias (Bolivian chicken pot pies), having the Andes Mountains as a back drop to life, traveling, learning to live life in completely different but equally acceptable ways, and being adopted by 2 or 3 Bolivian mothers.

Lowlights of the last 4 months: Diharea, more diharea, packs of wild dogs, angry parrots, crazy taxi drivers, sun burns, and diharea.

My life as of today: About a month ago I was officially sworn in from PC trainee to PC Volunteer… which was both exciting and scary at the same time.  Exciting because I was finally starting what I came here to do.  Scary because I was now leaving all of the Bolivian and Peace Corps friends I had made in the last 3 months to start my work.  I don’t think I fully realized what the heck I was doing until I was dropped off at my site – the city of Camiri – and the Peace Corps van drove off.  Alone.  In Bolivia.  Scary. 

Over the past month though, I’ve found a great place to live, an amazing host family, and a job with a lot of potential.  Right now I live in a house with a third floor patio over looking the city.  The family I’m living with is a young couple (the wife is 22 and the husband is 26) who have two children.  My home life consists of grilling Bolivian food and drinking mate (really good Bolivian tea… stuff). 

Work life is always interesting.  I’m currently working with two organizations… One of which is more like going to some crazy party in an office every day (ie. employees cracking open brewskis at the end of a long day… or in the middle of the day… whichever comes first, planning birthday parties and kareoke meetings on company time, and employees disappearing mysteriously for entire days on end)  Personally I find a lot of humor in it and it’s been a great way to integrate with the community since everyone in the office is well known.  The actual amount of work accomplished is another story.  Thus…

The second organization I’m working with is in charge of daily testing water quality for the entire city as well as doing random maintenence on water pumps, etc.  I’m learning tons from these guys and the job is very well structured.  Work starts at 7:00 bright and early and the crazy life is kept at a relative low.

Alternate names I’ve aquired in Bolivia: Wes, Lee, Wesley, Oeste (Spanish word for “west”), juez (pronounced “Wes,” means “judge”), Wilson, Poncho, Don Wesley… more to come, I’m sure.

Random Side Notes: There is never a dull moment in the Bolivian culture.  The people are generally poor and passionate in all they do.  It’s not uncommon for heavy-set Bolivian housewives to set up road blocks on major roads and refuse to move until the price of bread at the super market is lowered.  There is always some sort of celebration going on.  The American perception here is amazingly positive.  I have no doubt that part of my purpose here is strictly to entertain the locals with my foreign accent and constant inquiries to their endless expertise on how to eat indigenous food and dance the cueca.

Ending: Thanks for bearing with me.  I promise the next posts won’t be nearly as long since I will be posting weekly rather than… never.  Bolivia has been and continues to be a great experience and I’m looking foward to sharing a lot of funny stories with you.  Keep posted and be sure to send any other email addresses my way of other who’d like to be part of my blog. 

Paz,

Wesley